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How we got happy - Book Review

How we got happy: Stories of health, hope and happiness from 20 young Kiwis who beat depression

Nabbs, J., & Macfarlane, E. (2020). Self-published, NZ 

It can be hard to find your path through depression and everyone's battle is different. While we are getting better at talking about depression and how we're feeling we often don't get to hear about how someone got through its challenges. Set out as a series of stories from young New Zealanders from all walks of life accompanied with clean and natural photography, How We Got Happy is a new way to address wellbeing and the battle with depression.

Creators Jonathan Nabbs and Eve Macfarlane set out to answer the question: What are the things (habits, tools, beliefs, exercises, strategies) that have helped people move from the bottom of the bell curve into happy, healthy lives once again? Each story provides insights on the tools and skills that each writer found helpful in their struggle with depression. As someone who struggled with depression in the past, I would have found a book like this a helpful tool to learn from others' achievements.

The use of portrait photography mixed with questions that give the reader a bit more insight into how each writer experienced their depression made the whole book feel more personal. It was easy to find in some of the writers a bit of myself - in their experiences and the journeys they took to recovery. Each story is also accompanied by a small handwritten note by each author to their past selves when they needed help the most. The notes are strong and empowering reminders to themselves and the reader of the most important things to remember in our darkest times.

Filled with bright and engaging photography this book is an easy and uplifting read whether you read it cover to cover or to just pick up and flick through. No matter if you are currently struggling with depression or have found your path through depression, you will enjoy this wonderful collection of heart-warming stories from young Kiwis. A great coffee table book to have around the house.

Reviewed by Helena Loy

Rāhina / Monday

Take Notice | Me Aro Tonu

A fresh week, blank slate and a new beginning. Let's start the week by setting purpose and intention, today is the day to take stock – how have you been feeling recently, are there any events or stresses that you need to sit with and unpack? 

Developing the ability to be fully present and conscious without being overly reactive or overwhelmed is no easy feat, it takes practice to achieve the delicate balance of awareness. When we take notice or practice mindfulness, we’re creating space for ourselves—space to think, space to breathe, space between ourselves and our reactions.  

Use today as a reminder to pay more attention to the present moment, to our thoughts and feelings, and to the world around us. At the end of the week, you can reflect on how you felt at the start of the week, and how putting each of the Five Ways into practice has helped to boost your mental health.

A few ideas to help you take notice:

Rātū / Tuesday

Give | Tukua

Today is all about kindness. When we give selflessly to others, whether through our time, resources, or support, we create a positive ripple effect that extends beyond the people we engage with. Carrying out acts of kindness boosts our happiness, life satisfaction, and overall wellbeing. When we help others, it gives us purpose and a sense of belonging – it’s a win/win!  

Think about how you might be able to brighten the day of someone you care about, or even a complete stranger. A small gesture might mean the world to someone else, and you’ll get a bit of a boost, too!

A few ideas to help you give:

Rāapa / Wednesday

Be Active | Me Kori Tonu 

We're nearly over the midweek hump and are inching closer to the weekend. Today is the perfect opportunity to give yourself a refreshing boost by engaging in some physical activity. Wi tēnei rangi to get the blood flowing through your tinana/body?   

Physical activity stimulates the release of endorphins, the "feel-good" hormones, which can uplift your mood and increase feelings of happiness. It reduces stress and anxiety levels, promotes relaxation and enhances overall mental resilience. It can even sharpen our thinking and boost our creativity. 

Being active doesn’t always mean high-intensity cardio workouts, there are lots of ways you can move your tinana to uplift your mood, reduce stress, and feel a sense of achievement. Choose to do something that is purely for feeling good or having fun, and dedicate it to your wellbeing.

A few ideas hei āwhina/to help you be active:

Rāpare / Thursday

Connect | Me Whakawhanaunga

It’s nearly Friday – why not tap into those weekend vibes early, and carve out some time for some meaningful connection? Use today as a sign to arrange that outing or gathering with friends, participate in social events that you might be finding an excuse to skip, or seek out opportunities for shared experiences that deepen your connections.  

Connect refers to making social connections, or whakawhanaungatanga. A sense of feeling connected, loved or belonging with others is strongly associated with better wellbeing and other health outcomes by providing a sense of meaning, safety, support and purpose.  

A few ideas to help you connect:

Rāmere / Friday

Keep Learning | Me Ako Tonu

It might be the last day of MHAW, but today’s the day to reflect on what you’ve learnt throughout the week and implement those tools into the weekend and weeks beyond. 

Evidence suggests that learning or trying new things creates a sense of achievement, competence and stimulates engagement with the world around us. There are lots of ways that you can Keep Learning today and every day. 

A few ideas to help you keep learning: